I seriously have no freaking idea what's wrong with myself. I like to plan and think too much for my own good, so much so that it affects people around me. I feel bad, and most of all, SELFISH. The need to think, to plan ahead bounds down to the fact that I'm simply an emotional, insecure freak. And I guess no one can ever help me. Maybe not even myself. I'm trying to take a step back, just take many many steps back and look at the whole situation with a more relaxed attitude. Or can someone just simply remove the neurons or whatever in me that is responsible for this irritating behaviour of mine?

I wanna escape. Alone.